Healing Trauma with Mindfulness
Traumatic memories intrude into the present and disrupt our daily functioning. Mindfulness can enhance present-moment awareness, increase self-compassion, and strengthen a person’s ability to self-regulate. Mindfulness skills cultivate trauma recovery. The question for you is how do you use mindfulness for your trauma healing? I’m here to help you with that.
Hello, My name is Hong Jeong, licensed therapist based in Los Angeles, CA. This is our virtual therapy session #5 on how to overcome childhood trauma. In our therapy sessions, I’ve prepared a set of questions for your trauma healing. You can take your time to answer each question. If you’ve missed our previous sessions, I’d highly encourage you to watch them first. Alright, let’s review our progress. In our last session, we’ve talked about a simple tool to practice positive and authentic self-talk.
Let’s review!
#1. How would you describe your mood in the past week on a scale of 0 to 10 (0 being the most unpleasant and 10 being the most pleasant you can feel)?
#2. What emotional and physical change did you notice when engaging in your self-talk?
#3 Can you tell me at least 2-3 ways that you’ve helped your vulnerable parts/exiles?
Self-awareness is a key to emotional healing
I believe that self-regulation comes from self-awareness. All the skills and tools I’ve presented in my videos put a lot of emphasis on self-awareness. How do we feel when we’re fully aware of ourselves? Do we still resist our anger, frustration, sadness, and fear? My guess is that we come to accept ourselves. This means we are able to embrace all our feelings, thoughts, and sensations in our body. Self-acceptance brings many positive qualities.
A sense of gratitude is one of the important qualities. From my personal and professional experience, having a sense of gratitude is very difficult and yet a worthwhile exercise. One of the gratitude exercises I do on a daily basis is the loving kindness meditation. It’s a very specific type of mindfulness meditation focused on gratitude and compassion. It’s true that we as humans are connected and interdependent. To explain it better, human evolution developed through hunting and gathering. We hunt, farm, and build houses and other necessary resources together. We exchange goods and services to meet each other’s needs.
The Loving-Kindness meditation gets to the heart of this inherited interdependence. We want to be able to not only wish for our well-being but also the well-being of others. The purpose of mindfulness meditation is to be here and now. We often experience dwelling on the past or the future. By practicing warmth, compassion, and gratitude for yourself and others, we can achieve a sense of presence. Right now is a gift and that’s why it’s called the present. Putting some sort of mindfulness exercise in your daily practices will bring you many benefits for well-being. There is a lot of scientific studies to back it up. One apparent benefit of mindfulness is health benefits. A study found that people who practice some sort of mindfulness exercise are likely to have less health issues such as sleep problems, heart problems, digestive issues, and depression and anxiety.
Cultivate the healing power of gratitude
Let’s get into our comfortable posture. You can sit down and lie down. I prefer sitting tall. Gently close your eyes.Let’s pay attention to your breath. Let it come however it comes. Notice where you sense your breathing. You can feel it at the tip of your nose or feel the rise and fall in your abdomen or chest. Now notice the sensation of your body sitting here and give yourself a moment to connect with your neck, shoulders, back, lower body, and other body parts supported by gravity. Let’s stay mindful of our body.
Turn your attention to your breath. If you get distracted by your thoughts or external stimuli. Bring back your awareness to your breath. Notice one in breath and the next out breath. Can you feel the temperature of the breath? It’s a natural phenomenon. We’re simply and effortlessly noticing each breath without trying to change the breathing pattern.
Let’s take a moment to notice our thoughts. We might experience negative thoughts, neutral thoughts, worrying thoughts, positive thoughts, or hopeful thoughts. Let them come and go however they come and go...I’d like to visualize that thoughts pass by like a cloud in the sky. We do not have to stop clouds from coming. We can only watch them passing by. Let’s take a moment to watch our thoughts.
Alright, now gently bring a time when you experienced a sense of gratitude and connection with another person. You can think of a recent situation or your childhood memory. Let that situation come to your mind’s eye. As much as you can remember, bring all of the details to the forefront of your mind. Now let’s take a stock of how you felt in your body.
Let’s notice all the sensations associated with a sense of gratitude and connections.
Now let’s bring the image of that person you cared about and feel a sense of gratitude and connection to. You can place your hand on your chest as you think of this person in your mind’s eye. This way, you can be really present for this person. Now we will begin to wish this person well by extending words of kindness to him or her. Most importantly, I’d encourage you to practice this in a neutral mood and neutral setting and also to feel how your body responds to these words of kindness. There is a right or wrong way of doing this exercise. We’re just here to experience this present moment fully. Let’s begin.
Now, silently or out loud repeat these phrases to yourself:
May you well
May you be joyful
May you be safe and at ease
If there is something you want to wish for this person, please go ahead.
Again notice how your body responds to these phrases.
Now, with this sense of gratitude and compassion in mind and body, let’s take a moment to consider a positive and resilient statement that feels right and truth to you. I’d like to use “I statements” such as I can be happy...I’m safe...I can handle...I’m good enough.”
Now let’s think about your calm place or joyful memory. This could be a recent memory or childhood memory. To visualize this memory better, you can think of feelings, thoughts, bodily sensations, and images associated with this memory...And scan your body from head to toe and see how your body responds to this memory. Now see if there is a part of you that feels calm and maybe excited.
When we offer words of loving and kindness to ourselves. I’d encourage you to notice how your body responds to them. Please repeat silently or out loud following phrases:.
May I be well.
May I be kind to myself.
May I be safe.
May I be curious.
May I be joyful.
If there is something you want to wish for yourself, please go ahead.
Again notice how your body responds to these phrases.
Well done! Now let’s think about an upsetting memory during childhood. If it’s too upsetting, you can choose a mildly disturbing memory. And scan your body from head to toe and see how your body responds to this memory. Now see if there is a part of you that feels vulnerable and needs your support and some kindness. You can see this part as a child. Now By using your adult brain, let’s wish something good for this vulnerable part of you.
May I be filled with loving and kindness.
May I be safe.
May I be well in body and mind.
May I be at ease and happy.
May I be resilient.
If there is something you want to wish for yourself, please go ahead.
Again notice how your body responds to these phrases.
To practice our loving and kindness further, let’s think of someone you were in conflict with or simply disliked during your childhood. This is where things can get a little more challenging. Let’s be mindful of this without trying to change or push away our experience in the present moment. It is easy to send well-wishes to those we love. However, every step during this meditation has its own value. Let’s see if you take a moment to let go of resentment or dislike for this person for the next few minutes. You might experience anxiety, anger, frustration, or pain. Let’s be mindful of the sensations in our body with these emotions and contain them if possible. See if you can just be with those sensations and let them settle down naturally.
If you feel okay, please extend our loving and kindness to this person. I’d again encourage you to notice your body as you repeat these phrases.
May you be filled with loving and kindness.
May you be safe.
May you feel well in your mind and body.
May you be resilient.
If there is something you want to wish for this, please go ahead.
Again notice how your body responds to these phrases.
Now, bring your attention to your breath. Scan your body one last time from head to toe as you focus on your breathing. You might notice tension or relaxation, comfort or discomfort, pain or relief. Let those sensations come and go however they come and go. Take a deep breath. When you feel ready, open your eyes.
Trauma healing is an ongoing journey
How was your experience with this loving-kindness meditation? Remember, meditation is brain exercise. We’re exercising the parts of our brain that bring us a sense of focus, calm, and clarity in our mind and body. We can’t change everything that happens to us in life, but we can change the way we experience it. Take care of yourself and do your healing every day.
If you need assistance with letting go of your childhood trauma, please schedule a 20 minute free consultation with me.